Learning more about mercy

Saturday was a busy day. We had the typical Saturday cleaning. Then our oldest three had three different shifts to referee basketball games. Then Jeffrey had a birthday party for his twin friends from 6-8 pm. He had been counting down the days since he received the invitation. Also, it was Stake Temple Day. Katie was signed up to do baptisms for the dead in the afternoon, and Rich and I were scheduled to attend an endowment session at 6:30. Oh, and there was a Stake Dance that night from 8:30-11 pm.

By 5:55 pm, everyone was fed, Jeffrey was ready for the party with two wrapped gifts, the house was relatively clean, instructions had been given for the care of the little children, Rich and I were dressed, and we were ready to head out the door. Then I realized that I couldn't find my wallet. I frantically looked all over the house.

Katie offered to drive Jeffrey to his party, so they left and I had a prayer and kept looking. At 6:10, I told Rich I couldn't go with him to the temple since I didn't have my temple recommend.

At 6:15, Rich found my wallet in the van. We left for the temple at 6:16. I felt like it was a tender mercy that Rich found my wallet, and I wanted to relax and believe that we were going to make it to the temple on time, but the cars in front of us were traveling unusually slow and I was tense.

We pulled into the temple parking lot at 6:22. We hurried in, hoping we wouldn't make the whole room full of people wait for us. Our Stake President and his wife greeted us at the door. They seemed calm. The brethren checking our recommends were friendly. They seemed calm. Then, a nice sister greeted us as we separated to hurry to our individual locker rooms. She said something like, "No need to worry. You are just fine."

I knew we were going to make it into the session, hopefully without embarrassing ourselves too much, through what felt like a series of tender mercies

As I found my seat in the endowment room, I breathed a sigh of relief. I wasn't even the last woman in there. In fact, another five or six people came in before they started the session.

As I sat there, I thought through our day. Although it had been a busy day, I had spent 30 minutes looking something up on the computer that could have waited. That contributed to our tardiness. I felt humbled by the mercy Heavenly Father showed me, despite my weaknesses, to help us get to the temple on time.

Mercy. This seems to be one of the reigning qualities of our Father in Heaven. My prayers are answered even when I am not perfect in my efforts. I am forgiven every time I ask. I usually only feel love, not chastisement or heavenly scolding. When I make mistakes, which I do daily, He helps me to right the wrongs.

Heavenly Father provided a Savior so that we could make mistakes and repent and still return to live with Him again. It seems as if making mistakes is actually a part of the 'plan.'

Sitting there, I pondered how often I show mercy as a parent, especially when I consider that making mistakes is maybe part of the plan.

Am I patient as my children make the same mistakes over and over? Am I kind enough when they say they are sorry and express a desire to do better? Do I gently offer mercy when they don't live up to my, or their own, expectations?

Right then, I made a promise to be more merciful in the future. Then I prayed for help to feel more inclined to show mercy when that promise is tested.

It was tested right as we walked in the door.

The older three children had left for the dance before we got home. They had left without doing any of their dinner chores. They would be home too late to do the chores before bed. The chores had to be done because we had church the next morning and needed to have some dishes for breakfast.

Upon further investigation, we found that the boys had sat around watching a favorite tv show until it was time to get ready for the dance.

My first reaction was frustration and anger. Those kids! I wanted to get angry at everyone, and then make the teenagers feel the consequences by waking them up early to do their chores in the morning before church.

But then I remembered, I know with a gentle nudge from the Holy Ghost, my promise to show mercy. Funny how my first reaction is always anger at their imperfections.

I was reminded how hard they work all week long and how busy they all are. I was reminded how nice it feels to have the night off and to get a break from work. I was also reminded how it was their first day of referee work and that they were probably extra tired from that.

Instead of fuming and storming about the house, doing their chores, Rich and I came up with a plan to reward the little children to do the undone chores. It worked!

I felt happy, and I was able to be kind to the three teenagers when they got home later.

I am going to try harder to show my family and myself mercy. No one is perfect, and we all make mistakes. There is a time and a place for consequences, and there is a time and a place for mercy. Thankfully the Holy Ghost is available for guidance as we walk this fine line.

But I think I will try to err on the side of mercy more because that is the way my Father in Heaven treats me.